What would you do if you found a suitcase filled with a million dollars?

Dear Rich Bitch, if you found a suitcase filled with a million dollars what would you do with it? Curious

Dear Curious, that’s an interesting question. My first thought was that I would turn the money in to the local police station. I think I would have an easy time making that choice because I know fully that it would be the right thing to do; but when you’re actually faced with the situation the right thing might not be as easy to do as you think.

For some people, when they find money, they think to themselves that God meant them to find it. I remember one Christmas when I was about 11 there was no money for me and my little sisters to get Christmas presents. There were 3 of us living with one grandmother and it was going to be a pretty barren Christmas for us. I remember in the late after noon on the day before Christmas I left the house of the grandmother I was living with to walk to the house of my other grandmother hoping she’d have some Christmas cake for us or some little thing to make our Christmas a bit brighter. On the way I found $60. Everyone came to the conclusion that God had arranged the occurrence. I had found just enough money for myself and my two little sisters to be able to have a Merry Christmas after all.

But whenever you find money it means someone lost money. And that $60 I found might have been the last $60 someone had to their name to use to provide a Merry Christmas for their children. It’s easy sometimes to think of money you find as a godsend, but at the end of the day the money belongs to someone else and the right thing to do is what you would hope someone would do if you were the one who lost your money.

As to finding a suitcase filled with a million dollars, that would not be a usual find by any means. Wherever there is a suitcase filled with money in any amount, there is probably a crime attached. How many of us ordinarily stuff suitcases full of money? So in finding a suitcase filled with a million dollars, you would want to ask yourself what could result from you picking it up and taking it home. Even if you decide once you take it home to call the police, you have your finger prints on the suitcase. Even though you will tell the police that you came across the suitcase on the street and picked it up they’d probably still need to rule you out as a suspect in any crime that they might discover attached to the suitcase; and they won’t just rely on your word that your only connection to the suitcase is that you found it on the street. If you keep the money and dump the suitcase, let’s say the empty suitcase turns up as part of an ongoing criminal investigation. Your fingerprints will be on the suitcase. Let’s say the police are able to find you based on your fingerprints. They come knocking to question you. You have to explain how your fingerprints got on the suitcase. You don’t want them to know you took the money so you make up an elaborate lie. You’ve just put yourself into even more hot water. Why would an innocent person lie? So maybe you don’t lie. You admit you found the suitcase and took the money then dumped the suitcase. You’ve just admitted to the police that you are capable of committing the devious, criminal act of stealing a million dollars out of a suitcase you found on the street. They probably aren’t going to walk away with a thank you. You’re probably going to find yourself mixed up in something that has nothing to do with you but which you became embroiled in as a result of stopping to pick up the suitcase in the first place.

The moral of the story, if you see a suitcase at the side of the road, don’t stop to check to see what’s in it. Just keep walking. It might contain a million dollars, but finding a suitcase filled with a million dollars could turn out to be the worse thing that ever happened to you.

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