I need $1500 by Monday!

Dear universe, it is 10:42PM Eastern Standard Time. I asked you to deliver $500 to me by 9PM Eastern Standard time and you failed to do so. Why? Loral Langemeier said you would deliver. Dr. Ben Johnson said you would deliver. Bill Harris said you would deliver. Bob Proctor and Jack Canfield said you would deliver. So how come you did not deliver universe? Is it that you don’t consider me deserving? Or did I not give you enough time? Very well then, I am giving you 2 additional days to work with. I am putting in my request again. This time I am changing it up to make it a new request. This time I want $1500 by Monday at 12 noon Eastern Standard time. And I am not going to try to explain why I want $1500 instead of $500 because to do that would be to buy into the idea that I shouldn’t want more money than I absolutely need at any given moment. It’s a ridiculous idea. How is it greedy for someone with $395 to their name to ask for $1500 just because they were only asking for $500 a few hours ago? Is that the real problem here universe? Are we poor people poor because we feel guilty to ask for more than what is needed to hand over to the bill collectors?

Why should I feel guilty for wanting to have money I can use frivolously if I so choose? Hell, universe, you don’t punish people with money. Far from it you keep rewarding them over and over with more money. But here I sit working from morning until night and you won’t even see to it that clients pay me when time comes for me to be paid.

Hey universe, my rent is due on Monday. Do you hear me universe? My rent is due on Monday. I need $1500 and I need it on Monday by 12 noon and I will not take no for an answer!